Sunday, May 06, 2007

Storm Track Disinformation: When All You Have Is A Hammer …

During my ‘quality time’ for contemplation this Sunday (synonym for on the potty), I was reading the latest issue of Time Magazine. (Reading Time Magazine and potty contemplation seem to fit nicely.) At any rate, I was taken aback by their recent article entitled “How to Prevent the Next Darfur”.

Whao!! I said to myself. Time Magazine has awakened to the Muslim threat in the Sudan? Do they have a formula for preventing Radical Muslims from killing thousands of non-Muslims in Darfur? Or perhaps they’ve discovered ways to make sure that the humanitarian aid sent to Darfur is not being stolen by the war lords? Or perhaps a way to make Muslims speak out and do something about the killing of women and children and the starvation of tens of thousands of Darfurians? I read the subtitle of the article with baited breath. Would the solution to future Darfurs be finally exposed by the liberal media?

You’re right. Of course not.

The way to prevent the next Darfur is… ready? Drum roll please…"STEP ONE: GET SERIOUS ABOUT CLIMATE CHANGE!"

That’s right folks. Not the civil war. Not radical Muslims attempting to purify the land of non-Muslims. Not the defeat of the war lords who control the countryside. Global warming is the culprit and the reason for the thousands of deaths in Darfur.

How simple. How intelligent. Why haven’t we thought of that before? After all global warming is responsible for many of our problems. The solution? For liberals who have their new hammer of global warming, every problem looks like a nail. Thus the solution to preventing future Darfurs.

And someday soon the Left will prove that global warming is responsible for highway deaths, AIDS, cancer, high blood pressure, obesity and aggression in household pets.

So, are you disgusted and appalled by the humanitarian crises in Darfur? Do your part to prevent another one. Turn down your thermostat. Switch to low energy and light bulbs. Pay your carbon credit indulgences – Oh! and don’t forget to use only one sheet of toilet paper after going to the bathroom.

I did my part for Darfur. I didn’t use toilet paper at all! I used the Time article. Have a great week.

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